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HINDSIGHT: Charlie vs Whitney

While Whitney’s meltdown was a train wreck and MaSHEEN’s has been great entertainment, both have damaged their “perfect” images in front of the media. So who had the bigger fall from grace?

Words: Angel Diaz
Images: PRN / PR Photos, Robert Kenney / PR Photos, Lee Roth / RothStock / PR Photos, Andrew Evans / PR Photos

“Crack is cheap. I make too much money to ever smoke crack. Let’s get that straight. OK? We don’t do crack. We don’t do that. Crack is whack.” – Whitney Houston

Charlie Sheen has been a party animal since he first stepped onto the scene with that “tiger blood” flowing through his veins. Born into Hollywood royalty, his father, Martin Sheen, killed [Marlon] Brando, for Christ’s sake! Ms. Houston, on the contrary, was America’s darling, a role model for young African-American women everywhere. She went many times platinum and killed national anthems with a voice sent from the heavens.

Enter Bobby Brown. Good God Almighty, I swear that man is the anti-Christ. This crazy man with the full-time ecstasy lockjaw became an —what drug-rehabbers like to call—enabler. Once Whitney married Bobby, her life plunged towards the depths of hell, which usually happens when you do hard narcotics. Apparently they didn’t get the message from those cult movies about drugs that we watched in high school. “Hugs, not Drugs, children.”

To think, she was on an amazing run: a catalogue of platinum albums, The Bodyguard (movie and soundtrack) phenomenal performance of the national anthem at Super Bowl XXV, Waiting to Exhale, etc, etc. She kept up her “darling” image for the better part of two decades. But by the late ‘90s it was a wrap, the signs started to show. Extreme weight loss, ashy lips, crazy behavior and then the infamous Diane Sawyer interview. The train wreck that she was hiding under came out that fateful night; she committed career suicide for the world to see.

Aren’t drugs supposed to enhance an artist’s creativity? I mean, do only Mary Jane and heroin abide by these rules? The only good thing to come out of this marriage of crack fiends is the fact they were together for so long. Love is paying a $400K ransom to get your hand-tied, naked husband out of a NYC crack house. Proof positive that the couple that gets high together, stays together (Well, not really).

But she wasn’t put here to get high; she was put here to make timeless music. Whitney Houston doesn’t have “tiger blood” running through her veins. This we now know to be fact. I hope she gets her life together and she took a step in that direction by divorcing Bobby back in 2007. Her last album, 2009’s I Look To You, went platinum with no hit single; either because of her old fan base or out of people’s sheer curiosity to see what she would sound like post crack. And sure enough, smoking all that crack and blazing cocaine-laced blunts with Bobby ruined her angelic voice to a certain extent. Whitney’s career will never be what it once was. Crack is whack.

 

“I was banging seven gram rocks and finishing them, because that’s how I roll.” – Charlie Sheen

Make no mistake. Charlie Sheen is a crazy motherfucker.  We’ve all seen those “sober” interviews and tweets. If that’s him “sober” then that hooker had every right to lock herself in that Plaza Hotel bathroom. She was fearful for her life, unaware of the things that warlocks on cocaine do. What did she expect? The Sheen is a fucking rock star, one of the gnarliest rock stars to walk this Earth, better yet, this terrestrial realm, as Charlie would prefer.

Race has nothing to do with this article.  It has everything to do with rookie versus grizzled veteran. Bobby Brown is a veteran. He can get high and “somewhat” function. Whitney? Not so much. Fastball! Charlie is in the Hall of Fame. His binges are mentioned in the same breath as Keith Richards, the ultimate fiend; Keith had to get a blood transfusion because it was so polluted. This is the type of badass we’re dealing with, people. He fully admits to smoking shit loads of crack and is proud to be able to walk away and share his journeys with the masses. We all thought he was headed towards a life of normalcy when he got married the first couple of times, especially after he bagged the smoking hot Denise Richards; didn’t happen. Poor Charlie just wanted to win so damn much…and party with porn stars while smoking crack. Two and a Half Men, the show he was axed from, was loosely based on Sheen’s lifestyle. And it’s a pretty safe bet to say, Charlie Sheen will get another shot. He’s too much of a personality not to and besides, he’s got a powerful and respected father in the business, a la Robert Downey Jr.

The moral to the story, kids, is don’t do drugs that you can’t handle. We are witnessing Charlie Sheen in his realest and most unadulterated form. Whitney Houston ain’t about that life.

Images by of PRN / PR Photos, Robert Kenney / PR Photos, Lee Roth / RothStock / PR Photos,  Andrew Evans / PR Photos.

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